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Main points to keep in mind when talking to kids about divorce

It can be quite challenging for Connecticut parents to balance adult issues in marriage with parenting issues involving young children. If you and your spouse have decided to dissolve your marriage, you might be worried about how to tell your children. Especially if your kids are under age 10, it can be difficult to find the right words to explain the life-changes they are about to encounter.

There is no one way to carry out such a task. You know your children and are the person best equipped to determine what is best for them, which is also something to keep in mind during custody proceedings. As for talking to them about your divorce, it may be helpful to talk to close friends or family members who have gone through similar experiences in the past.

Take it one day at a time

Young children are only capable of absorbing so much information at one time. If you lay all the information on your kids at once, they might feel more stressed than if you talk to them in a series of conversations. The following list includes other useful tips to help your children come to terms with the situation:

  • Leave adult matters between adults. Your marital problems are not your children's problems, so don't drag them into it.
  • Be careful of the wording you use to explain your divorce. You don't want to turn your children against their other parent.
  • Be honest, but keep things simple.
  • Allow your kids to share their emotions freely without worrying that their reactions will upset you.
  • Tell them that your divorce is not their fault. Even if you think they know this, it is always best to say it out loud.
  • Let them know you'll be there to support them as you all adapt to a new lifestyle.
  • Let them know that both their parents love them very much.

Beyond that, you can do and say whatever you believe will help your kids cope. Divorce definitely impacts children but doesn't necessarily have to ruin their lives. You no doubt hope to be able to achieve an amicable co-parenting plan, but if your ex has other ideas in mind and you expect a contentious situation, you might want to arm yourself with information about Connecticut custody and visitation laws ahead of time and know where to seek support of a problem arises.

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